If Seven and The Craft conceived a child and then aborted it, it would be The Sinners. Here is a movie wherein seven high school girls form a group in which each member must embody one of the seven deadly sins, but then they sin by omission instead of by commission.

For example, the girl who represents sloth “has been offered full athletic scholarships to eight [NCAA] Division I universities.” How exactly can this be? I mean, lazy people do no get full rides, athletic or otherwise. Or is the movie suggesting that ‘working out’ is not really ‘working’?

Similarly, the one who has chosen to assume the sin of gluttony must be bulimic as well, because she has no visible weight issues. And then there’s the one who admits not knowing why her sin, pride, is even a sin in the first place. This is the same girl who claims to own two Bibles (“one for [catholic] school, one for home”), which enables her to know the answer to every question ever asked in class – which in turn I assume is the source of her pride, not that there would be anything really sinful in that.

Now, if she – or, for that matter, co-writer/director Courtney Paige – had read either of those Bibles, she would know that “Pride goes before destruction, and a haughty spirit before a fall” (Proverbs, 16:18), and that “God resists the proud, but gives grace to the humble” (James 4:6). I guess Paige is really the only one here who has been slothful.